I recently placed an order for something that I really, really want and think I deserve.   The ordering system was so easy - MUCH easier than ordering lunch at a restaurant or shoes from Zappo.   Amazingly easy.  Anyone could do it.

    

I am on a quest to take really good care of myself.  It will involve changing some of my old habits and starting new ones that will help me BE the person I really want to be.  Most of the women in my family and a majority of my female friends are excellent at taking care of others first.  The "gang" and I will give and give until we are angry and exhausted, and some medical ailment will send us to bed or a spa to get some rest.

I'm ready to break the cycle.  Enough already!

I started a few months ago with something easy - washing my face and putting on nice lotion before bed.  It seems so simple, but taking that extra 5-10 minutes is still a challenge for me.  The next thing I added was a short yoga routine every morning.  Two new habits that I'm still working to make as automatic as brushing my teeth every day.  I can't wait for the day when I won't even think about it, I'll just wash my face automatically.  Or I'll go straight to my yoga room when I open my eyes each morning.

It's time to kick it up a notch!  I'm ready to raise my standards and make really big shifts in the way I take care of myself!  I'm focusing on 3 new standards starting today:

1. I enjoy pleasurable evenings at home.
2. I love to move my body and it keeps me feeling young.
3. I'm well rested.

I started the week by blocking time in my calendar.  Every time I glance at my schedule I'll be reminded to plan around my new standards.

The next step is to determine what I need to say NO or YES to in order to achieve these new standards.  Strong boundaries around these new standards will be very important.  I'll need to say NO to working late, NO to skipping yoga and NO to staying up late.  And I'll say YES to having pleasurable things to do each evening, YES to 15 minutes of yoga and YES to my nightly ritual to prepare for sleep.

I'm excited about my new level of self care!  I believe that self care is the strong foundation that is needed to build a super fantabulous life.  If you have stories about successes or struggles around self care, please share them!

You might enjoy reading these articles that inspired me:

Leo Babauta's blog Zen Habits is about motivation, among other things.

Read about how powerful our thoughts are at the Good Vibe Blog!

If you liked this article, please SUBSCRIBE or share it on StumbleUpon or Digg. I’d really appreciate it!

    

There is an awful lot of anger in the world, isn't there?

I was reminded of that yesterday on my way to do a little shopping at Target before heading into downtown for a few hours of work.  As I turned left into the shopping center, a guy in a pickup truck cut me off.  It only delayed me a second or two, and all I said was Excuse ME as he crossed in front of me.  No cussing, no anger, no hand gestures of any kind.  I didn't give it a second thought.

I attracted a great parking spot so the day was getting better and better!  As I walked to the front door of the store, a pickup truck headed down the aisle towards me.  The color looked familiar and as I looked at the driver it started to dawn on me that it was the same guy!  I wondered why he had turned left and cut me off if he really wanted to go straight across the street to Target.

Just then, he rolled down the window and said some super nasty, personal things to me.  Close up and personal.  I could tell he was a really, really angry guy.  I said "what did I do?" and held my hands in a  questioning gesture, before he sped off.

WOW!  That was unexpected!  I felt so bad for him having to carry all that anger around.  I hoped he felt better after spewing some of the poison onto me, because that much venom could kill him!  What could make him so mad that he would go to that much time and trouble to do that?  Maybe he just lost his job, or the bank wouldn't help him with his mortgage, or his mother never loved him.  Poor guy.  At least he was going to have a little relief for the rest of the day.

How is your personal anger level?  Are you so happy that no one can get to you with their personal problems - that's what I'm aiming for.  Or are you someone who has to bear the brunt of a loved one's anger?  I discovered that "STOP THAT" works pretty well for any and all verbal abuse.  And learning EFT helps for the times when the words sting too much.

If you carry a lot of anger around inside of you, get rid of it!  It's killing you and affecting everyone you come in contact with (or drive by).  Is that REALLY what you want?  Really?

And for those of you who are on the journey to concoct a life that you choose - what would you have done in my place?  I want to create a life that isn't bothered by someone else's issues, especially if that issue is anger.  And I would like to make the world around me a less angry place. 

    

Poverty.

What pictures spring to mind when you think of poverty?  Perhaps a street person in your town who is dirty and a little scary.  Or a single mom who is doing her best to raise four kids in a 1-bedroom, run-down apartment on the dangerous side of town.  What about those starving children from the TV commercials with the swollen stomachs and the big, hungry eyes.

These people feel a strong need for basic resources like money, food or shelter.  It's probably the central thought of their lives and drives most of their daily actions.

Now I'd like to ask you to look at a different part of town with me.  Let's zoom over to the "right" side of the tracks where, over the past few weeks, America has been in the midst of an economic crisis that has caused a serious drop in confidence among its citizens.  Lack of confidence affected the stock market resulting in record drops.  Everywhere I go someone tells me a story about losing $20,000 in their 401k in one day.  They are suddenly in real fear of losing their job, of not being able to make the mortgage payment, or belong to the right clubs.

We are in a panic of national proportions, fanned by the media and the current government.  It's a different kind of poverty, but just as real and pervasive:  an impoverished spirit.  With so many people thinking about what is lacking or threatened in their life, we are bound for some pretty hopeless times unless we can turn this trend around.  If you're reading this you probably have a computer and a place to live rather than a cardboard box under a bridge.  You can fight your feeling of poverty by being grateful for what you do have and for all the success you have achieved in your life.  What will it hurt to be optimistic in the face of this panic?  What if everyone was a little more optimistic today?

My personal challenge for today is to be deeply happy and grateful, and to spread hope to the people who are suffering from spiritual poverty.  We can only make the world, and poverty, better by our thoughts of abundance, our optimistic words, and our hope-filled deeds.  Will you join me?


My Kiva Start Up

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This post is part of Blog Action Day 08 - Poverty

    

October 15, 2008 is Blog Action Day, an annual nonprofit event that brings bloggers and podcasters together around one issue.  The focus this year is Poverty.

I'll write more about it on October 15th, but in the meantime I wanted to give you a chance to join in.  What do you think about poverty?  Have you heard about Kiva microloans or Women for Women International?  Perhaps you do volunteer work that helps?

My Kiva Start Up

    

This weekend I am giving myself a personal retreat, the 2nd one this year.  As I write this I am feeling very relaxed, unhurried, peaceful, curious, happy, content and full of intuition and insight.  I pulled the desk over so that I could look out of the 15th floor hotel window onto downtown Dallas, the city where I was born.

It's a time for reflection:

• I see the grassy knoll where President Kennedy was shot, and I remember hearing about it in the 2nd floor library of my elementary school in nearby Oak Cliff.  School closed that day, and I'll never forget the B/W Magruder film nor the coverage of the funeral.
  
• I see the red Pegasus atop the Magnolia building in the center of town.  When I was a child it was the second highest building in downtown.  Now you can barely see it because of all the skyscrapers.  My firstborn son was 2 years old when he declared that he worked in the building with the red flying horse.
  
• I'm very near One Main Place.  My father worked as an electrician to help build that building, and probably several others in the area.  As a child I could feel the struggle of keeping a family of six fed, clothed and happy.
• I work downtown now, and I enjoy my work, my title and my paycheck.  I am proud of how far I've come and of my accomplishments.  I'm looking forward to Act II, whatever that is for me.
  

It's a time for looking forward:

• I am here seeking clarity about my life and the next steps for accomplishing my dreams.  Can I imagine and feel what it would be like to have a super successful blog, life coaching practice, extreme self care and a healthy, trim body?
• What do I want to accomplish at work?  How long will that take?
• If I focused on my relationships, how would I enhance them? What are the best ways to touch the lives of my grandchildren - what do I want to teach them?
• Can I change my financial situation so that I can easily retire to a new career of helping people to create a life with their highest visions?

Seems like a long list doesn't it!  My heart sings with the possibilities, and I know I will go as far as I choose to.

When was the last time you took time for yourself?  Have you EVER put aside all your responsibilities for an hour, a day, or a weekend to dream and plan and refresh yourself?  I encourage you to take some time soon.  In fact, if you're reading this you should take it as a sign and pick a day on your calendar right now.  You can borrow someone's house who is out of town, or take a trip, or bid really low on Priceline for a hotel nearby.  You CAN make this work.  Take a project or two with you.  And some music you love.  Do what your intuition tells you - something that has been nudging you "think about this, what if you did this."  You know what you need to do.

Those times when you feel like you have no power over what is happening in your life are exactly the times to make a different choice.  How you relate to what's going on around you, your reactions and your next steps are all up to you.  You'll see this more clearly if you give yourself a break every now and then.


Current inspiration from:
Dream to Reality: How I Quit My Day Job | ThinkSimpleNow.com
So I Quit My Day Job - Holy Cow! I Took the Plunge | Zen Habits
Conversations with God Book 1 by Neale Donald Walsch
Money and Law of Attraction by Esther and Jerry Hicks
Ladies Who Launch by Victoria Colligan & Beth Schoenfeldt with Amy Swift
You Can Heal Your Life by Louise L. Hay
and many others

    

Let's add up the stress points for today using a scale of 1-10 (10 being high stress):

It's Monday - 2 points
Not enough sleep - 4 points
Running late - 3 points
Behind on a few projects at work - 5 points
Wondering if we will start re-training the admin soon - 5 points
Computer won't work in new meeting room - 2 points
Can't have agency meeting because computer won't work - 4 points
Fellow employee explains, through tears, that I'm the meanest person on the planet - 10 points
Fun lunch with understanding, super-wise friend - 1 point (talked about the situation)
Residual stress from earlier encounter - 8

Total points:  44 out of a possible 100

Giving a grade to each situation helped clarify everything.  A few incidents had high stress, but taken as a whole I see that I was below the halfway mark for the day.  So I think I'll just quit feeling sad and worrying about how to fix this.  There's always tomorrow . . .

    

I always thought of myself as a "circle of life" pet owner - you have pets that you love, take care of, and eventually they grow old and die.  It's perfectly natural, even though it's sad.

This time I lost 2 pets at once and they were likely killed by coyotes.  Talk about the circle of life!

Sometimes I'm so mad at the coyotes I would strangle them if they walked up to me.  Other times I hope the coyotes are making their way in the city.  And I can also spend time wondering if there is a way to alert my neighbors.

But I miss my cats.  I miss having someone to talk to and take care of, and I miss their love and attention.  I've been depressed, of course, and feel too overwhelmed to be very creative.  Every day gets a little easier.

I can't even imagine how hard it will be to lose a family member or friend, although the loss of my cats is teaching me alot about relationships without regrets.

Boo and Cleo - thanks for everything.  I miss you!

    

Father's Day morning, June 15, 2008. My sweet, loving tabby cat Cleo went out after midnight and didn't come home for breakfast. A week and a half later, Boo, my devoted, bumbling, black cat was gone the same way.<< MORE >>

Check out the totally on-target, and completely free ebook written by Chris Guillebeau, from The Art of Non-Conformity.  A Brief Guide to World Domination can be read in one sitting, and I can't say enough good things about it.  The first time I read it I felt like I had "come home" - a feeling I get when there's nothing to prove or justify because I'm among people who know me, or in a place that is so perfect it invites complete rest.

Have you ever felt like that?  Isn't it a great feeling?

If you believe that life is supposed to be wonderful, but you haven't figured it all out yet, download and read about World Domination.  Let Chris know what you think and come back and tell me, too!